FIRST PONS TO MARS
the first pons leaves the pad as soon as the cigar is fresh and the window is open. it is a one way trip, which sounds harsh right up until you remember how this planet was using him.
$spaceP
SPACE P
a new space company with one mission: make pons multiplanetary. earth was only the beginning, and the beginning is already behind us.
MAKE PONS MULTIPLANETARY ★FIRST PONS TO MARS ★P CITY IS ALREADY ZONED ★PARLINK COVERAGE IS TOTAL ★PESLAS ON MARTIAN ROADS ★EARTH WAS ONLY THE BEGINNING ★
MAKE PONS MULTIPLANETARY ★FIRST PONS TO MARS ★P CITY IS ALREADY ZONED ★PARLINK COVERAGE IS TOTAL ★PESLAS ON MARTIAN ROADS ★EARTH WAS ONLY THE BEGINNING ★
CONTRACTsoon — click here on launch dayTAP TO COPY
SIGNATURE SYSTEM · PAD 04
THE LAUNCH CONSOLE
STATUS — SITTING ON THE PAD, CIGAR LIT
PAD 04 · CH 01 · PAL
ALTITUDE0 km
VELOCITY0 m/s
THRUSTIDLE
VIBESSTABLE
CIGAR / FUEL REMAINING
> console warm. the letter is on the pad, the rocket is under his arm, and nobody has asked him to put it down.
PERSONAL BEST 0 km
MISSION STATEMENT
MAKE PONS
MULTIPLANETARY
a new space company with one mission. we are sending the first pons to mars, building p city, launching parlink and putting peslas on martian roads. earth was only the beginning.
i founded the company and then i hired myself as the chief engineer, the ground crew, the safety officer and the guy who says go. every meeting is me standing on the pad talking out loud, and every proposal passes unanimously, because everyone in the room agrees with me for reasons i consider obvious.
the rocket fires the entire time, under my arm, and i have never once climbed into it. earth was only the beginning, but somebody has to stay down here holding the thing while the beginning finishes, and that somebody has a cigar, a schedule and no intention of sharing either.
first a pons lands on mars, then p city gets poured around wherever it lands, then parlink covers the sky and peslas fill roads that do not exist yet. the order is not negotiable, the dates are extremely negotiable, and the announcement always ships before the hardware does.
eventually i bought the alphabet outright, because owning the letters is cheaper than asking permission to use them. that is how a rocket, a city, a satellite network and a car company all ended up starting with the same letter, and nobody has yet explained to me why that is supposed to be a problem.
THE COMPANY · FACTSHEET
HEADQUARTERS — pad 04. it is a rectangle of scorched concrete with a folding chair on it, and i have referred to it as a campus in three separate interviews.
EMPLOYEES — one. he has been employee of the month for eleven consecutive months in an internal vote that i personally oversaw and would describe as completely fair.
FLEET — one rocket, permanently lit, permanently under the arm. there is no second rocket, because there is no second arm.
CADENCE — a launch happens whenever the cigar is fresh and nobody has physically stepped in front of me. in practice that works out to roughly daily.
SAFETY — the safety officer has signed off on every mission so far, which is impressive, because the safety officer is also the one holding the rocket.
FUNDING — the cigar. while it is lit the program is funded, and when it goes out i buy another one and the program is funded again.
THE PRODUCT LINEFOUR THINGS, ONE LETTER
P CITY
a city on mars where every street, every tower and every sign is the same letter. zoning was approved on the spot, because i am the mayor, the developer and the zoning board, and all three of us have agreed from the start.
PARLINK
a constellation beaming the letter down onto every surface in the solar system for a very reasonable monthly rate. coverage is described as total in the announcement and as partial in every measurement anyone has actually taken.
PESLAS
electric cars built for martian roads and delivered well before those roads exist, which i consider a scheduling advantage rather than an oversight. the doors open in a way that has never once been necessary and i am not taking questions on it.
OFFICIAL TIMELINEREVISION 14
FIRST PONS ON MARSyear one year two next yearthe vehicle is ready and the passenger is ready, the date is simply shy
P CITY GROUNDBREAKINGq2 q-nextthe plans are finished, they are one letter repeated at municipal scale
PARLINK FIRST LIGHTpendingthe satellites are in a box and the box is on the pad
PESLA DELIVERYalready late latethe cars are done, the roads are the holdup and always were
EARTHcompleteearth was only the beginning, and the beginning is behind us
DOWNLINK
LAUNCH FEED
CH 01 · PAD CAM
TRACKING — SUBJECT REFUSES TO PUT IT DOWNREC ●
VOL
two cameras cover pad 04. one of them points at the letter and one of them points at whatever the letter is currently leaving behind, and honestly the second one has better ratings.
ARCHIVE · SIX FLIGHTS ON RECORD
MISSION MANIFEST
PATCH SEWN BY HANDNO ABORT BUTTON INSTALLEDCIGAR RESUPPLY: WEEKLYTHUMB CALIBRATEDSHOES: ONE PAIR, SIX FLIGHTSPAD 04 IS FINE
CAsoonTAP